Not everyone’s calling is to tread the boards, maybe you’re not one to seek out the spotlight and actor possibly wasn’t on your list of dream jobs. You don’t have to be totally dramatic, darling to enjoy a little role play in the bedroom. Well, any room to be honest. Role play has a lot more to it than just popping on a French maids outfit.

So how do you role play confidently even when you’re a little shy or you don’t know where to start?

Start small

You’re not acting for an audience, you aren’t trying to win an Oscar so you can keep your fantasy simple. There’s no need to come up with complex back stories for your characters, unless you really want to and you really don’t have to talk much at all if that isn’t your thing.

If you’re not sure quite where to start keep it simple. How about a classic teacher punishes naughty pupil scene or you could have your partner be your butler, handyman or cleaner and order them about. The idea doesn’t have to be particularly complex, just something you and your partner will enjoy.

You don’t have to keep up the role play for the whole of your sexual encounter either. It might be that once you get out of your clothes and into giving each other pleasure it all just fades away, that’s fine. The whole point of the role play is to enhance your sex life and that means only you know what will work best for you.

Choose your Character

Some people might find that off the cuff is the best way to go. Maybe something happens that just inspires a little bit of playing pretend. Maybe the sink’s blocked and your darling wife fixes it. You can then pay her in kind for her services. It could be that he spills the wine or drops a knife on the floor and you can then punish your employee for making a mess. You can take inspiration from anything.

If the idea of just making it up as you go along makes your heart palpitate in a ‘I’m having a heart attack’ kind of way then don’t panic. You can, of course, plan everything in advance. Pick your character, what your job will be and how the scene will go. It can be a really good way to get in the mood just by planning out what could happen before anything even does.

Props

It’s going to be a lot easier to keep in character if everything you need is to hand. So if you’re playing headmaster be sure to have your cane somewhere accessible. It might be easier to get into your role if you set the scene before hand by using props to change a room into the perfect setting for your fantasy.

You don’t need to have an impressive office to play secretary, just a notepad and a pen, possibly a sturdy table might come in handy too depending how you think it will go. If you want to be a servant you don’t have to buy a French maid’s outfit, just a pinny and a feather duster could do the trick. You can definitely create a scene within your budget.

You don’t have to spend a fortune if you don’t want to. That’s the joy of role play all you really need is your imagination.

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Hehehehe you said penis.

Part of role play is conversation. Dirty talk doesn’t necessarily come easy to everyone. You can’ get caught up in worrying about sounding silly. The thing is that saying something that makes you or your partner giggle isn’t the end of the world. Sex doesn’t have to be serious, in fact sometimes the very best sex is absolutely hilarious. Laughter can be sexy. It might break you out of the role play for a little while but you can finish rolling around laughing and get back to it. Just don’t let it dent your confidence. We all say something silly sometimes.

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The trick, and it’s not an especially difficult one, is to just keep going. If something hasn’t quite worked try something else. If you can’t remember the word you want, use a different one. If you’re really squeamish about using a certain term for your bits or your partner’s bits don’t use it. It’s okay to just utilise the vocabulary you’re comfortable with. It really doesn’t matter if it appears a little out of character for the role you’re playing as long as you and your play partner are having fun.

Read some Smut

If you’re still not sure how to start, cheat. Pick up a book of erotica—I would suggest a volume of short stories on a theme you enjoy—and pick a tale which turns you on. Now read it out to your partner. Let them know what it is about the story that turns you on and then when you’re ready, you can act it out. This way you already have a script and you know how it’s going to go.

This takes a little research, it’s easier if you already read erotica because you might even have a story or a scene in mind that you’d like to use but there’s a world of amazing erotica out there and it’s the perfect place to find role play inspiration.

The key to sexy, strong role play is confidence. Confidence comes from trust. To get the most out of your adult session of let’s pretend do it with someone you really trust. This way if things do go a little off piste, you more likely to be able to laugh it off and carry on regardless.

Whichever scene you decide to play out remember to relax and just have fun. It’s meant to be a turn on, not an audition. You can be as serious or as ridiculous as you like. Wear what you want, say what you will, do whatever turns you on. Just let your imagination run wild.

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