“To take a photo of oneself, to pose and press a button, is to declare one’s thereness while simultaneously hinting at your eventual death.” ~ Tamara Kneese

Sorry to start off on a morbid note but the truth of the matter is we all change, with time and life experiences. The people that we are evolve and grow throughout our lives and our bodies go along that journey with us. I took my first self portrait in my mid 30’s. Prior to that I had snapped the odd selfie to send a lover but it was not until I posted one to my blog that I discovered just how powerful it is to take your image and share it with the wider world.

There is something very exposing about it and yet it made me feel strong and very alive and instantly I was hooked. I will warn you now, photography is addictive and taking self portrait images is in my opinion one of the most addictive forms of the media. It is also, for me, the most thrilling, exciting and challenging one too.

Since those first blurry, grainy images I have gone from using a little a point shoot (camera phones were only just starting to appear on the market and were definitely out of my price range) which I balanced on pieces of furniture and darting back into frame having set the delayed timer button to its maximum of 10 seconds, to working with a Canon 7d SLR on a tripod with a camranger attachment that allows me to use my phone as a remote screen and fully manual remote control.

Told you it was addictive and it’s not just the kit that has evolved, the style, location and, I hope, quality of my work has changed with time too and what started as a playful experiment has turned into an ongoing project that explores my body and how I feel about it.

"Knowing others is wisdom, knowing yourself is Enlightenment." ~ Lao Tzu

Exploring yourself through erotic photography

For me erotic self portraits have allowed me to explore my body in a huge variety of different ways and allowed me to really learn its shapes and abilities and the many different ways in which it portrays the different aspects of my personality. I am not young, in the accepted traditional definition of that word, I am 44. I have had two children and for much of my 20’s and some of my 30’s I was significantly overweight.

My body shows the marks of all this history and yet through my self portrait work I have come to not only accept how it looks but in many respects love it too. I would be lying if I said I love the way my body looks all of the time because I don’t. There are days when I hate my wrinkled saggy tummy, and the noticeable size difference of my breasts but I also have learned to accept them as being part of me, and my body and I know that my body brings both me and my partner immense pleasure.

[clickToTweet tweet=”My body is a vessel for the person that I am” quote=”My body is a vessel for the person that I am”]

My body is a vessel for the person that I am, it serves me everyday not only in giving and receiving pleasure but in allowing me to be an active productive person. For that I am always grateful. Taking pictures of my body has also allowed me to see myself from perspectives that no mirror can ever afford you, and without a doubt that has given me the gift of knowing that I have a fabulous bum, that my curves are beautiful, that my neck is sculpted and if I throw my head back in just the right way, utterly inviting. I know my legs look good in stockings, that my tits looks full and sensual, that my cunt nestles perfectly between my thighs, especially when my knees are drawn up. All those things I have learned about my body from photographing.

“I take pleasure in my transformations. I look quiet and consistent, but few know how many women there are in me.” ~ Anaïs Nin

Which brings me perfectly to another reason I love erotic self portraiture. I am many things, a woman, a lover, a submissive, a wife, a mother and even more than that within my sexual self I find eroticism in many various incarnations of me. I am a slut, a whore, a innocent, a girl, a wild animal, a temptress, a ghost, a victim. The list is varied and long and taking self portraits allows me to explore myself in a huge multitude of different roles.

I am also a writer and words, as we all know are powerful things, but I think the saying that an image can speak a thousand words has a lot of truth to it and of course unlike words photography transcends language barriers. No matter what language you speak when you look at my images you see them through your own personal lens and as such can interrupt what they mean to you without having to speak the same language as me.

I love writing stories and writing about my own sex life and sexuality but it is through my images where I really feel I get to express and explore myself. For me taking a great shot is far more satisfying and rewarding than writing a story because I have captured a fleeting moment forever. It can never happen again, it can be recreated but it still won’t be the same, in my photographs I imprison the moment, the feelings, the story, the vision, forever.

So what about you? Fancy giving it a go?

Clearly if you have a partner in crime it makes life a lot easier because you can then concentrate on being just one person, either the photographer or the model and if you fancy trying both and have someone who feels the same then you can happily swap roles. There is something very sexy about both taking someone’s picture and having your picture taken but the key is finding someone you trust to do it with.

As with all things remember to get someone’s full enthusiastic consent before taking their picture and also I would advise having a conversation about who owns the images and what you will do with them after they have been taken. If they are to remain private then clearly you want to be working with someone who is going to respect that. The law states that the person who takes the image owns the copyright however if they want to publish them anywhere then they are going to require your consent to do legally.

Of course if you are going it alone then you do not have to worry about this as you are both model and photographer and as such in control of the whole process. There is something very empowering about this in my opinion. You don’t need an expensive camera, although a better camera might be something that you will grow into, you can definitely get started with a decent camera phone. My one piece of kit that I would highly recommend you do buy though is a tripod. You can get them for camera phones as well as traditional cameras and they will allow you to take a much larger variety of images without having to contort yourself into insanely difficult poses. Trust me, I have done it, and taking a great shot of your bum is almost impossible without one.

Now that you have the kit all you have to do it take the plunge. My top tips for taking a great erotic self portrait are:

• Only do what you are personally comfortable with, you don't have to get naked to create something hot and sexy and you certainly don't have to show your face in your images if you don't want to.
• Try shooting in a variety of different poses and angles but as a general rule looking down the body is far more flattering than looking up or flat on and yes, it is totally OK to show off your best bits and hide those you don't want to show. Remember, this is about you exploring your body through photography.
• Try to eliminate distractions; dirty laundry on the floor in the background will probably detract from the sexy shoes you have put on. Remember, photography is essentially painting with light, so good light is the most important thing when it comes to getting a great image and as such lots of natural light is the best lighting you can get for free.
• Finally locations, your home is full of possible places, the sofa in the front room, maybe you have a fireplace, the stark plain floor of your kitchen, the clean white lines of the bathroom and obviously the sensual comfort of your bedroom but if you are feeling really brave then you can definitely head off outdoors and use the beautiful scenery that the world around you has to offer.

Avoid school holidays and in my experience early mornings and late afternoons are going to find you far more likely to be joined by dog walkers. The great outdoors has a wealth of opportunities for you to explore but you will need to do some leg work. Get out and explore, identify locations and visit them on more than one occasion before leaping in and stripping off.

The law in the UK regarding nudity is pretty straight forward. It is not an offence to be naked unless you are causing a disturbance/breech of the peace or are doing it to harass or offend others. For the most part if you are in the woods or rural fields you might get spotted by the odd other walker but I have found that most people are stunningly unobservant and will often pass right by me and not even notice what I am doing and if you were ever caught by the police, which is highly unlikely if you have picked a remote quiet spot, they are probably going to give you a talking to and inform you of the dangers of what you are doing and send you on your way.

Now that would be some story to tell wouldn’t it?

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